I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize