it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
they need to just BURY HIM!
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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