tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
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