Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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