Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
