Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm getting married
To pizza
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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