O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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