is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
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Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
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I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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