i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
4 words: hood of his car
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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