just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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