i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
