I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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