Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
