What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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