I have demons in me.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
