Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
