normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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