You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
be right there i have to get my cape
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize