sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize