let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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