you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
