I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
