that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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