i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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