Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
