Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize
