therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
