I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I cut my penus on the lid.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
