This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize