please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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