Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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