All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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