I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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