It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
