I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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