Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize