just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
