i need an iv and a liver transplant
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
