my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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