Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
