Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Randomize
