he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
