After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize