That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
