I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
