I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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