Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize