even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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