fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
