WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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