dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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